You're my best friend

Steve is out. As of now. I'm tired of him treating me like shit, and just wanting me for sex. I thought i was done with all this. Now I wonder about Tim. He says that he will always be there for me, but I needed him last night and he never answered me. I don't know. I understand that he is busy, and he has his own thing going on, but really....please don't tell me you are always there for me and when I needed you, you weren't there once again. I feel like I keep bugging him all the time, and I feel like I keep bugging my friends all the time cause I've been so down in the dumps lately. But its always about the same thing, and I think that my friends get tired of hearing about it. And I sometimes hate that its always for the same reason. I wish I could just put all of my suspicions aside and just live without worry about everything that goes on with all my friends and whether or not they care or what not. I know they care. I know they love me. I just wish I could trust that and be ok with that and just not worry about if they don't text me back or they don't text me at all. I just need to chill out and I don't know how. Gahh.

I have so many plans this weekend, and right now, I just don't want to do any of it! I'm going to make myself do it. But I know that it will be a hard task, but I can do it. I know I can.