Yoga Poses and Depression

i did yoga yesterday morning at my salon for 41 minutes. the rest of the day, i felt relieved, fine, and only a little bit depressed.

today, another story. its been a wretched day, i guess you could say. it could be worse. i went to go to work this morning and my car wouldnt start. it still sits in my driveway because i havent managed to get my father out there to look at it. i feel like nothing, and like nothing matters, and no one cares. like im going to be alone for the rest of my life and no one would care that im not here, even though i know its not true.

i feel like i feel like im losing my only friend from ball state, my other best friend has found a "girlfriend", even though he has still been talking to me, i havent seen him in almost a week. i miss hanging out with him, and i miss talking to my other friend from ball state. my other best friend, her boyfriend broke up with her, and i still cant manage to push myself to go see her. i know how she's feeling, but i cant manage to do it. i dont know if it because of my depression. i hate to be a baby about all this, but i just hate it. i hate that my happiness is dependent on a man, and on medication that i take all the time. am i realy dependent on a man?? ive been feeling like this for a while, even before he got his girlfriend. is that even it? im sure it is adding to it, but so is everything else, with my car not starting, friends leaving me behind, seeing ex boyfriends at work all the time, and they dont bother to help me when some bread almost topples on top of me.

there is my vent for now. i dont feel better though.........

Clarkston: Day Three

We left south bend at about Twelve thirty, and finally made it to Clarkston about four thirty, and got checked into the hotel. We sat around for about a half hour, cooled off the room, and unpacked our stuff for the night. The room we got was very nice, and I will totally visit back there. There was a lake right outside the back of the place, and it was a great price for what you got. We left for the venue about 515 and got there in a very short time. We waited in line for about 10-15 minutes before we got in. The venue was really nice! One of the nicest i have ever been to. The landscaping was nice, and it was very comfortable.

Street Sweeper Social Club was very good yet again. No complaints, except I kind of wished that they changed up their set list instead of playin the same thing, but when you are a new artist, that's what happens. You people should check out their new CD that comes out June 16!

Nails came on abotu 730, and i was very dissapointed because they didnt last for much more then an hour, which i kind of wondered if it was because of the venue and being on a sunday night. Their set list was this that night:

Now I'm Nothing
Terrible Lie
Sin
march of the pigs
Piggy
The Frail
The Wretched
Discipline
Burn
Gave Up
La Mer
Lights in the Sky
Non-Entity
The Downward Spiral
Wish
Survivalism
The Hand That Feeds
Head Like a Hole

Not much more to say about them now! It was great to see Non-Entity and Lights in the Sky and Now I'm Nothing. the seats we had were great, and we didn't bother to stay through Jane's because Tim nor I really liked them, so we just left and went back to the hotel and relaxed for the night, and to be off early the next morning.

It was a very nice weekend and i really enjoyed myself, which i am glad about.

Noblesville: Day Two

Noblesville, IN was the second of my Nine Inch Nails following. It was probably the best of the three. I was very amazed. It rained a little bit on the way down there, but nothing of concern. I didn't check the weather before I left because I really wasn't worried about it. We got there, and had to wait in line for like, EVER to get into the doors. there were a lot more people there then when I seen them back in July of '06 with my mom. I dont know if that was on account of Janes Addiciton or not. oh well.

We got to our seats, and by this time, Street Sweeper Social Club was already playign, about half way into their first song. It was just as great as the first time, but it was Tom Morellos' birthday, so they whole audience sang happy birthday to him. :D it was awesome.

Nine Inch Nails then came on. It was very awesome, once again. The setlist was as follows:

Home
1,000,000
Discipline
March of the Pigs
Piggy(Nothing can stop me now)
Metal
Meet Your Master
Head Down
I Do Not Want This
Gave Up
The Fragile
The Downward Spiral
Wish
Survivalism
Mr Self Destruct
Physical (You're So)
Good Soldier
The Hand That Feeds
Head Like a Hole
Hurt (Encore)

About half way through Nails set, the clouds started to build up. There was lightning as well, shortly after. I thoguht it was going to be amazing to watch nails during a storm, but i am also afraid of thunderstorms. Well, I wasnt worried about it too much until the guy behind me came back to his seat and asked if we had heard the tornado sirens going off. Then I got scared. It poured and i was very amazed that the venue didnt do anythign about the fact that there were tornadoes in the area. But, besides the storm, it wasw very awesome, and now I think about it, it was very cool to see nails duringa storm. The girl I met on NIN.com was at this show, and i got to meet her for the first time. She was on the floor, right in front of trent, front row. i was jealous. she later messaged me when janes was on and said that she got trents water bottle. I was SOO jealous then.

Janes addiction Finally came on. The storm had passed at this point, and we only stayed for about three songs of Janes set. Dave Navarro looked pretty awesome, but that was proly the only good part about it. They had great energy. The lead singer apparently sings from his balls, which is probably why he sounds like he does when he does sing.

We finally made it home about two thirty, and the next day was Clarkston, Michigan show.