missing Nine Inch Nails concert?!?

never in my life would i ever let this happen, but last night I dreamt that i was missing the saturday nine inch nails show in may because i forgot about it and had to work! i couldnt believe it was happening in my dream. i was at wal mart with my sister helping me work and i realized that i was going to miss nine inch nails. so, i some how left work, and was driving through the ghetto with Street Sweeper on, and of course, they say the 'N' word in the song, so the people in the ghetto didn't like it very much. of course. i ended up getting to the show, i dont knwo how because it was the one in indianapolis. i got there and it was a sit down place, and julia greenwood was there, and she was mad at me because she didn't want to be there that early.

i guess its a fear that i have that i might miss a nine inch nails concert or something would happen that i would not be able to go to one.

i really think im going to turn my blog into a dream journal because those are the only exiciting things that happen in my life anymore. haha.

Last night, this morning

i think i should just make my blog my dream diary. lol. ive been having really strange ones lately, and i havent even been telling anyone about them, which is strange. most of the time is because i dont think that i can really remember them, but i sit in classes all day and ponder what i was dreaming and try to remember them because something sets my mind off to what happened or if i had dreamt about it.

last night, i think i was in a castle, and people were chasing after me, and firing long harpoon things at me. I think i managed to retreat to a modern basement in this castle, where there were some guys that i went to high school with, i think it was chris bolka, and stephen piazza(who i never talked to)and they were playing video games in a room that looked very similar to one at the student center at BSU. Even while i was in the basement, the lady who was firing things at me was still taking aim at me, so i ran upstairs and outdoors into crowds of people who were on spring break maybe? but i dont remember how, but some other guys got mixed up with me and we were seperated in groups like slaves and cattle. i remeber being in a room with two other guys, and a bed in the middle that moved. Lasers suddenly appeared and aimed at any movement that was there, and i was not allowed into the bed because there wasnt room, so i had to roll aroudn the floor to get away from the lasers. next thing i know, i was in showers where i had to shower in front of everyone because there were no curtains. i dont remember much more but i think what i did manage to remember was crazy enough

dreams

the other night, i had a dream about beau. it has been the second one that i have had about him in the past two weeks or so. the first one was just whatever, the second, was a little more, even though i dnot remember too much, just yelling at him and running into a bathroom to be comforted by liz and to soon take a soothing shower. i dont want to think about him, he's not in my life, things are done, and im happy with the way things are. or am i?

i miss him. or maybe i just miss the cuddling and the constant compliments and the constant text messaging, and just having someone there. but i feel like im happy the way things are, but maybe deep down, im not, and im just a little hurt still. i don't know how to explain it, or what to even think about it.

i think its just the night time thing, that my medication from the day wears off and i just sit here and think more about things. a number of things cross my mind, and i just dotn know what to think abotu them at all or even what to write about, and if i do think of something, i dont know if i am comfotable with putting them on the internet.

i dotn know what i miss.

maybe just seeing a nine inch nails concert. haha.